I really hate when I feel like someone is judging me, but deep down I know they really aren’t, and I’m just judging myself.
Last night I learned that my BPD symptoms really come out when I’m overly tired.
Sometimes I’m really positive my boyfriend is a saint to put up with me.
Anybody with BPD…
My therapist recently told me that I was ready to be done with therapy. We were going to have one more session in two weeks, but I had to postpone, so it’s been 3 weeks since that session, and I’ve honestly had a really rough backslide. I’ve been insecure, neurotic, self-hating, having lots of mood swings, and just general feeling like my insides are going to boil over. I don’t think I’m doing this because I feel abandoned by her (though I love her and she is the most amazing therapist I’ve ever had), but maybe I am subconsciously because I’ve heard that this is common for people with BPD.
So, I guess my question is have you ever backslide into depression/anxiety/etc. after a period of doing well because your therapist told you you were ready to leave therapy or cut down on sessions?
mermaidlostatsea replied to your chat: My worries about my relationship a month ago: I’m…
and then at the same time I’m worried about being engulfed, I’m worried that if I ask for space he will be okay with giving it to me, which is both what I want and what I don’t want because it would mean he doesn’t love me as much as I love him (in my mind).
this is exhausting.
- My worries about my relationship a month ago: I'm going to be abandoned!
- My worries about my relationship today: I'm being engulfed!
- Linesofdietcoke: I'm asking my therapist about getting a lobotomy.
- Missenya: can I get one too?
- Linesofdietcoke: sure, I'll ask about a two-fer.
- Missenya: maybe they have a BOGO sale going on.
- Linesofdietcoke: it is Memorial Day weekend sale time.